[A Hypothetical Media Encounter Somewhere in Pennsylvania]
HERSHEY—In Breaking News From the Campaign Trail, Republican Arizona Senator and presidential candidate John McCain today announced that the state of Arizona has volunteered to store America's nuclear waste and spent nuclear fuel rods in a newly proposed storage facility.
The Arizona Nuclear Waste Disposal and Landfill Facility [ANWDLF] will be open for business at "an unspecified date. But certainly in the near future,” said Senator McCain. “Probably sometime after the election.”
“That’s Assuming We Don’t Lose, of Course,” Senator McCain said, as his face broke into its characteristic, now-familiar grin.
“I’m Not George Bush,” the long-time Republican Senator observed. “Barack Obama should have run for president four years ago. Progressive income taxes are a form of socialism. Even Joe the Plumber knows that.”
“Nuclear Waste Is Completely Safe,” continued the Senator. “We’ll store those rod from now until Doomsday. Not even Joe the Plumber would be afraid of nuclear waste. Why, I’ve been driving around with the United States Navy in nuclear-powered submarines for years.”
The ANWDLF is Slated for Construction near the Phoenix, Arizona, home that Senator McCain shares with his second wife, Cindy McCain.
“More Power to the Arizona Nuclear Waste Disposal and Landfill Facility,” McCain-supporter Ed the Electrician observed to a usually reliable source. “Now that the issue of nuclear-waste storage has been resolved through the generosity of John McCain and the state of Arizona, the one real obstacle to nuclear energy is removed. Nuclear power is safe and cheap, and it does not make you glow in the dark, as some have mistakenly reported.”
Following the Hershey, Pennsylvania, Rally, Senator McCain and running mate Sarah Palin are scheduled to appear this afternoon at a rally in Quakertown, Pennsylvania. Later this evening, the Senator continues on to a separate campaign event in Fayetteville, North Carolina.
Additional Information About the Safety of Nuclear Power is available from FEMA, the Federal Emergency Management Agency, through the following link:
HERSHEY—In Breaking News From the Campaign Trail, Republican Arizona Senator and presidential candidate John McCain today announced that the state of Arizona has volunteered to store America's nuclear waste and spent nuclear fuel rods in a newly proposed storage facility.
The Arizona Nuclear Waste Disposal and Landfill Facility [ANWDLF] will be open for business at "an unspecified date. But certainly in the near future,” said Senator McCain. “Probably sometime after the election.”
“That’s Assuming We Don’t Lose, of Course,” Senator McCain said, as his face broke into its characteristic, now-familiar grin.
“I’m Not George Bush,” the long-time Republican Senator observed. “Barack Obama should have run for president four years ago. Progressive income taxes are a form of socialism. Even Joe the Plumber knows that.”
“Nuclear Waste Is Completely Safe,” continued the Senator. “We’ll store those rod from now until Doomsday. Not even Joe the Plumber would be afraid of nuclear waste. Why, I’ve been driving around with the United States Navy in nuclear-powered submarines for years.”
The ANWDLF is Slated for Construction near the Phoenix, Arizona, home that Senator McCain shares with his second wife, Cindy McCain.
“More Power to the Arizona Nuclear Waste Disposal and Landfill Facility,” McCain-supporter Ed the Electrician observed to a usually reliable source. “Now that the issue of nuclear-waste storage has been resolved through the generosity of John McCain and the state of Arizona, the one real obstacle to nuclear energy is removed. Nuclear power is safe and cheap, and it does not make you glow in the dark, as some have mistakenly reported.”
Following the Hershey, Pennsylvania, Rally, Senator McCain and running mate Sarah Palin are scheduled to appear this afternoon at a rally in Quakertown, Pennsylvania. Later this evening, the Senator continues on to a separate campaign event in Fayetteville, North Carolina.
Additional Information About the Safety of Nuclear Power is available from FEMA, the Federal Emergency Management Agency, through the following link:
http://www.fema.gov/hazard/nuclear/nu_before.shtm
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment